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Life, or something like it

TH - Secret Look Twins (unknown)

I've been having a lot of fun trying to get my garden prepared. It is finally warming up here, so that doesn't leave me much time to get my seedlings in the ground. I truly adore this time of year. I love watching things come to life and bloom.

 

I've been bring my time to rethink my life lately. Mostly because of my health, but it has required me to examine some of my goals.

 

For example, children is one issue. I have finally come to accept that physically it will not happen for me. I have not quite closed the door on adoption, but I know it is a far off goal.

 

As for the rest of it it's just a matter of rethinking how I'm going to approach my future career. There's a lot of things I can't do anymore because of my physical conditions. That has been the hardest, letting go of a dream.

 

For now I'm taking it one day at a time.

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
velvetwhip
May. 14th, 2013 05:07 am (UTC)
:::hugs:::

Gabrielle
saifai
Jun. 5th, 2013 05:16 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the hugs. :-)
fantomeq
May. 14th, 2013 06:11 am (UTC)
I'm kind of in a similar boat. I'm doing lots of volunteer work and it's been extremely hard on me, and I'm realizing working full time is not going to happen ever. I'm too physically and neurologically disabled. Which sucks to admit but is an important part of accepting oneself.
saifai
Jun. 5th, 2013 05:17 pm (UTC)
Why does accepting oneself have to be so hard? >.< Volunteering is a good start. My mom mentioned that to me the other day.
reddwarf75
May. 15th, 2013 03:06 pm (UTC)
Will u have flowers in your garden? What kind? :)
Marie
saifai
Jun. 5th, 2013 05:21 pm (UTC)
I've got day lilies, mini hollyhocks, lunaria (silver dollar), four o' clocks, and some petunias. I had others but the seedlings didn't make it. Right now I'm hoping more of last year's bulbs keep coming back. My wisteria, bleeding heart, and trumpet vine are all coming in nicely.
pattyp53
May. 20th, 2013 10:39 am (UTC)
I don't know you well, but you have my support. I am there too. What was different for me is that I decided not to have kids early on since I married late. That was over 35 years ago. Now I am partially disabled, and have to say having online friends to laugh with on LJ helped save my butt after I was disabled in an accident in 2001. Since then, I've had to adjust my fave leisure activities (no more camping, hiking the deep woods and so on), and I'll never work outside the home again. Pain is my constant companion, but life still has a great deal of promise. I am always optimistic that something good waits around the next corner.

Creating art and craft, sewing, light gardening, other activities of that type have helped me, along with having a loving hubby who is my best friend.

The gardening sounds great! I've got pumpkins planted in the back yard, and am adding perennial herbs a few at a time to my flower beds. I can't bend over and do the work myself but get help and direct the activity.

My advice - when a dream is let go, create new ones to take it's place. You indicated you are figuring that out right now. I know it's hard and involves some soul-searching. I wish I could offer more. I do believe in possibilities - positive things to come - beyond what one can currently see. Good luck!
saifai
Jun. 5th, 2013 05:23 pm (UTC)
Thanks for your kind and encouraging comments! So true too. I always used to hear that when one door closes another opens. Its just hard letting go of a dream. I've got new ideas now though. Now I'm looking for new opportunities and searching for some confidence. Good to hear others have been there. It all helps. :-)
pattyp53
Jun. 5th, 2013 06:40 pm (UTC)
You are quite welcome!
*gentle encouraging hugs*
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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